of decay and dying of certain memories.. within myself...

These were some verses which I had scribbled when I had visited my alma mater - IIT/ Kanpur, some 6-7 years (SEpt '87) after I had moved on.... re-discovered them today in the pages of an old diary... as one keeps discovering such/these memories....
all written during "IIT/K, 29/09/87"

I.
To come back
and to find
that things have changed...
Time cheated you
while your back was turned
and stole away
certain unknown moments
of hazy possibillities
from your life
and left you
insecure, unsure, lost, alien
in you momentary nakedness


II.
Innumerable possibilities
whose warps and weaves
create that magic carpet,
which flies towrds the lofty aims
and goals
.. like the archetypal soap bubbles,
which would burst in the mid air
and dump me
back
into the reality
which I chose to disown...

III.
Disillusionment with a past
which somehow
always assumes a glitter in the memory
to be soiled
when you come in contact with it...
by
a yellowing palm-leaf in the pot
a tube-light which twitches and flickers
a tattered patch in the roof
unkempt grass patches
and cobwebs in the corners
... all signs of decay and dying
of an external reality
which is also a projection of a process
of decay and dying
within myself
of certain memories....